General Gripe #5: Hair Colorery

Recently, I have noticed that the wait times for a simple haircut at my local Hair Cuttery are increasing exponentially with each passing visit.  It's gone from no wait about a year ago to at least a 45 minute wait recently.  Can you guess why this is happening to me?  After careful examination of my visits to the Hair Cuttery over the past year, I think I have finally figured out why my wait times are increasing...

WOMEN, more specific -
WOMEN ABOVE THE AGE OF 40, even more specific -
WOMEN ABOVE THE AGE OF 40 GETTING THEIR HAIR COLORED, most specific -

MULTIPLE WOMEN ABOVE THE AGE OF 40 GETTING THEIR HAIR COLORED

This probably isn't the only reason for my extended wait times, but from my viewpoint, it is the most obvious one.  I really don't want to come off as insensitive to the needs of these women, but this desire to "color" your hair at a walk-in hair place is becoming quite detrimental to my schedule. 

Three Questions (with My Comments)

Question #1:  When did Hair Cuttery start dedicating all of their staff to hair coloring?
My Comment:  The past two times I have come in for my haircut, there were four "stylists" hair-cutters present, and in both instances, every single one of them was coloring the hair of a woman above the age of 40.  Then, after I'm finally called for my haircut, I realize that I'm only getting my hair cut because they can squeeze me in while one woman is in the drying phase of hair coloring.  To make matters worse, I see that there are two timers on my hair-cutter's stand, which means she is doing a hair color procedure on multiple women.  Wow, so every stylist at Hair Cuttery is doing at least one hair color, and most are doing two at a time.  I must have missed the memo about Hair Cuttery changing their name to Hair Colorery, because haircuts are no longer allowed there.  Haircuts are only allowed during the drying phases of multiple women above the age of 40 getting their hair colored. 

Question #2:  What about those of us that are just trying to get a ten minute haircut?
My Comment:  See above, haircuts are no longer a standard practice.  It's all about the hair coloring!!  Hair Colorery is born!!

Question #3:  Who comes to a walk-in hair salon to get their hair colored?
My Comment:  The foundation of my gripe starts with this question.  I feel as thought the coloring of one's hair should be done at a full-scale salon, not a walk-in location such as Hair Cuttery, Super Cuts, Mastercuts, etc.  Maybe I'm completely wrong about this, but if I were trying to get my hair colored, I wouldn't want it done by a "stylist" hair-cutter at Hair Cuttery.  You might as well color your hair yourself with a boxed product from the store. I cannot imagine the results being that different.  I know I wouldn't be able to tell the difference between the two methods...but I'm a male, so I guess that doesn't mean much coming from me.

Bottom Line - I really wish the wait times for my haircuts were not increasing with each visit.  For a walk-in location, I should not have to wait 30 minutes because of multiple hair colorings.  I do not mind the wait if it is because of HAIRCUTS, but the wait times at my Hair Colorery are clearly increasing because of multiple women above the age of 40 getting their hair cut colored.

Social Gripe #4: Internet Narcissism

Recently, I have had some interesting encounters with a few of my neighbors through the message board on my community's website.  In trying to explain the actions of the neighbors on the message board, only one doctrine seems to adequately describe their online personalities - narcissism.  Definition of Narcissism from Wikipedia:

The term Narcissism refers to the personality trait of egotism, which includes the set of character traits concerned with self-image ego. The terms narcissism, narcissistic, and narcissist are often used as pejoratives, denoting vanity, conceit, egotism or simple selfishness. Applied to a social group, it is sometimes used to denote elitism or an indifference to the plight of others.

Since narcissism is such a broad term and I only know of these people's digital self, I felt the need to create my own narcissism subcategory.  Hence the birth of Internet Narcissism from yours truly:

The term Internet Narcissism refers to the personality trait of egotism that exists in certain individuals when using the internet.  Individuals with Internet Narcissism disregard the emotional well-being and/or feelings of others while on the internet.  Their selfish nature leads them to post harsh responses in an attempt to belittle the recipient.  An Internet Narcissistic will not recognize, discuss, or concede the opposing viewpoint of another individual when communication occurs through online message boards, forums, chats, and/or email.

For all I know, my fellow message boarders could be decent human-beings outside the confines of the internet; even though that seems unlikely considering the foul language being used on the message board.  The issue at hand that has stimulated these fevered discussions on my community's message board is SPEEDING.  

Issue:  A handful of residents from my community feel that too many people are "speeding" in, out, and around the neighborhood at all times of the day.  

Fiction #1:  Children may die because of these speeders.

Fact #1:  No such event has even come close to fruition.

Fiction #2:  One individual, whom I shall call Internet Narcissist #1 (IN#1), cited the result of "32 tickets in 2 hours in October of 2009 after a speed trap was in place along Sansbury" as evidence of a speeding problem.  

Fact #2: What IN#1 fails to realize is that the majority of those 32 tickets were given to people going less than 30mph.  These people were not speeding excessively and would not have been given tickets in all likelihood if the speed limit (20mph) was set at the standard residential speed limit of 25mph for Maryland.

Examples of Internet Narcissism  
(from the speeding thread of my community's online message board)

  

Example #1

The speeding discussion on the message board had been going for some time and it didn't seem to be going anywhere.  They were just complaining back and forth, so I interjected:  "You people are going to give yourselves a hernia over this stuff. If speeding is the worst of our neighborhood problems, then things aren't that bad. I would be more concerned if things like vandalism, sex predators, and drug trafficking were happening everyday."

Probably not the most appropriate way to dive into the conversation, but I think I have a right to my opinions.  IN#2 responses with "I cannot believe you would say that. Speeding is breaking the law…..period, dot."  I see this as the first stance of Internet Narcissism since he is telling me I'm not allowed to state my opinion and even though I never said it was okay to speed, I must have according to him.

Example #2

IN#2 continues his thoughts:  "Our continued complaints have resulted in the installation of 'traffic calming devices' sometime in the future, additionally, raise the speed limit to 25mph. Raise the speed limit? You have got to be kidding. The philosophy is that having the current speed limit at 20mph forces people to speed. So raising it to 25mph won't? So, with the differences of opinion employed by the deputies, could be 30mph, could be 32mph. Now that is some logic we can all live with. That might save you five seconds from the condos to MD260. Is your time that precious? If the residents don't take control of this situation, it will only continue to deteriorate. And yes, get over it, I will take my hernia and wear it proudly".   

IN#2 is not seeing the bigger picture.  In the current situation, driving any speed over 20mph is considered speeding.  Penalizing people by the way of tickets for driving between 21 and 25mph is wrong since the residential standard for speed in Maryland is 25mph.  IN#2 is also trying to quantify the value of my time.  Five seconds may not be very precious to him, but it is to me - classic narcissistic egotism. 

Example #3

IN#3 decides to chime in:  "Apparently you do not have children. You are most likely one of the people flying past houses at 45 miles per hour. If you do not like doing the speed limit like a responsible adult, then I suggest you move to a different neighborhood."

So because I want a reasonable speed limit of 25mph, I must be an irresponsible, childless adult that speeds around the community at 45mph.  I did not realize that having children makes one care more about the safety of others.  According to his logic, all people without children are heartless and should live in gutters.  As I defined earlier, Internet Narcissists will "post harsh responses in an attempt to belittle the recipient" while using "pejoration" (slander) remarks.

Recap

These three examples only represent a small portion of the anybody's opinion but their own - truly narcissistic people.

-WARNING-

Internet Narcissism is a horrible condition that is even harder to diagnose.  Since the condition results in big egos and mental blindness, most carriers of Internet Narcissism* will never realize they have a problem because of their self-absorbed nature.  Please take great care of oneself when confronting Internet Narcissists on internet message boards, chats, forums, and/or email.

*Websites dominated by registered users are filled with carriers of Internet Narcissism.  Avoiding these websites (slickdeals.net for example) will keep you safe from the spread of Internet Narcissism.  The "veteran" users of these websites will use Internet Narcissism to criticize you to no end for the smallest mistake.

NBA Player Performance - sPPR

For some odd reason, the gold standard for determining player performance in the NBA is the Player Efficiency Rating (PER).  It was developed a few years back by John Hollinger of ESPN.  He calls it "a rating of a player's per-minute productivity."  I've never been a big fan of PER, or John Hollinger for that matter (He's a Wizards Hater).

To start with, PER does not account for a player's defensive performance.  According to Hollinger's PER introduction article, "PER is not the final, once-and-for-all evaluation of a player's accomplishments during the season. This is especially true for defensive specialists...who don't get many blocks or steals."  This is utterly baffling to me.  Why not adjust your methodology to account for defensive statistics?  The formula is already complicated enough that adding a few more variables shouldn't be that big of a deal.  I don't see how Hollinger can claim PER as an adequate way to obtain a player's level of productivity.  One cannot measure a player's overall efficiency without incorporating offensive and defensive productivity (despite popular belief, defense does count for something in the NBA).

Oh, by the way, the very long PER formula can be found here, if you want to bore yourself.  I will not discuss Hollinger's PER statistic any further due to its convoluted and bias nature towards offensive performance. 

I have developed a basic statistical methodology for calculating the net offensive and defensive performance of an NBA player.  This new statistic, simple player performance rating (sPPR), will measure the current effectiveness of an NBA player in a given season.  Four offensive and four defensive primary statistics recorded by the NBA will be used to determine sPPR:

Four Offensive Statistics
True Shooting % (TS%)
Points Per Game (PPG)
Assists Per Game (APG)
Defensive Rebounds Per Game (DRPG)

Four Defensive Statistics Used
Steals Per Game (SPG)
Offensive Rebounds Per Game (ORPG)
Blocks Per Game (BPG)
Turnovers Per Game (TPG)

To simplify the calculation for sPPR, the eight offensive and defensive statistics listed above were condensed into five statistical factors:

Shooting Efficiency (1) - max: 100%, min: 0% - player receives one tally per level* of TS% achieved

*Levels - 35, 40, 45, 50, 53, 57, 60, 63, 65, 68

Scoring (2) - max: 30, min: 0 - player's PPG is used

Passing (3) - max: 10, min: 0 - player's APG is used

Rebounding (4) - max: 10, min: 0 - player's DRPG is used

Intangibles (5) - max: 8, min: 0 - player's SPG plus ORPG plus BPG minus TPG is used

sPPR Calculation Steps
1.  Each factor's tally total is divided by its corresponding maximum.  Multiply factor 4's result by 1.5 to create a fair baseline between guards and forwards/centers.  (creates an equilibrium between all positions)  
2.  Add up the results of step one.
3.  Divide the result of step two by the total number of factors (5).
4.  Divide the result of step three by player's team pace.
5.  Multiply result of step four by 100 to achieve sPPR.

Example:  Chris Paul (as of March 3rd, 2010)

Step 1
Factor 1 = 50.97% = 4.0 tallies
Factor 2 = 20.4 = 20.4 tallies
Factor 3 = 11.2 = 11.2 tallies
Factor 4 = 4.1 = 4.1 tallies x 1.5 = 6.15 tallies
Factor 5 = 2.3+0.5+0.2-2.5 =  0.5 tallies

Step 2
40+68+112+(34*1.5)+6 = 316.4

Step 3
316.4/5 = 63.6%

Step 4
0.632833/94.8 = 0.006675

Step 5

sPPR = 0.006675 x 100 =  0.667546 or 66.8%

So what does all of this mean?  Based on simple statistics (sPPR), Chris Paul is second most effective player in the NBA - only 1.6 percentage points behind LeBron James.

Top 10 sPPR (as of March 10th, 2010)

I realize that sPPR may not be the most statistically sound way to measure NBA player performance since statistics like usages rates and minutes played are ignored, but its better than trying to make sense of PER's calculation.  I think you need a Ph.D. in statistics to understand decipher the PER methodology, whereas the sPPR formula should make sense to everybody because its methodology is based on common sense and simple terminology.  Based on my findings, I believe sPPR is a more accurate representation of an NBA player's combined offensive and defensive prowess. 

The complete working file with all of the NBA player statistics and sPPR calculation is located here.  A results file with a comparison of Top 10 between PER and sPPR is listed here.  An updated copy will be kept in the Proposition Documents page and on the right side toolbar.

Sports Gripe #4: Lindsey "The Perpetual Choker" Vonn

Now that the 2010 Winter Olympics are over, I feel the need to vent about Lindsey "The Perpetual Choker" Vonn...

The Olympics in a nutshell for Lindsey Vonn

She may be the most disappointing United States Olympic athlete ever.  Don't even try to defend her.  You would be wasting your breath.  The truth is in the photos...

Event #1:  Downhill

Medal Podium of Women's Downhill

She won the gold medal!! Woohoo!! She became the first American woman to win an Olympic gold medal in downhill.  Excellent news, but her comments after the win were less than desirable - "I have what I want".  Nice attitude considering she still had to compete in four more Olympic events.  And don't forget the fact that the United States has never been dominate in the Winter Olympics and needs every medal possible to stand a chance at winning the Winter Olympics.  I guess national pride doesn't matter to Vonn, just personal accolades - sounds like a typical American to me.  And you wonder why the world hates us... 

Event #2:  Super-Combined

Vonn's Crash in Super-Combined

So much for an American gold medal in the Super-Combined.  Vonn was leading after the first leg, but showed us all how easy it is to choke in the Olympics when she didn't get her ski around a gate.  As a result of this crash, the gold medal was won by a German named Maria Riesch, who happens to be Vonn's best friend (so much for befriending your teammates).  Thankfully, the very sincere and grateful American, Julia Mancuso, managed to win the silver medal.  It turns out that Mancuso and Vonn are rivals even though they are on the same team (WHY!?!?).  I think it is safe to assume that the rivalry was created by Vonn - stupid people like her tend to create rivalries.  Athletes from the same team should not be rivals when the goal of the Olympics is win the most medals for your country.

Event #3:  Super-G

Bronze Medal - boring

Nothing too exciting here...Vonn won the bronze medal with a lackluster effort.  The quote from Vonn says it all - "Once I passed the tricky sections, I think I let off the gas pedal a little bit. I just didn't continue with that aggression all the way to the finish".  Thank you for not giving 100% Lindsey - the citizens of the United States appreciate it...at least she didn't crash this time.

Event #4:  Giant Slalom

Vonn's Crash in Giant Slalom

Her status as The Perpetual Choker was cemented with this crash, but that is only the half of it.  The crash also damaged her teammate's (Julia Mancuso) chances of winning a medal in the Giant Slalom (it isn't all Vonn's fault since it was the IOC's decision to shorten the interval between starts, but Vonn shouldn't have fallen regardless).  But it was Vonn's comments later that vaulted her into the epic stratosphere of audacity.  "But I can't help that I fell. I wanted to finish."  Talk about a stupid comment.  Message to Vonn: you can stop yourself from falling by skiing better and not choking!!

Event #5:  Slalom

Random (Not From Slalom Run) - LOL

In her last event of the 2010 Winter Olympics, Vonn straddled a gate and was immediately disqualified - an appropriate ending for The Perpetual Choker.  And following the race, another loser quote from Vonn:  "I'm totally satisfied with everything I have done here. I have the gold medal I came here for."  Really, you're satisfied?  Well, America isn't.  I find your lazy, self-centered attitude unacceptable and unbecoming for an Olympic athlete.  When the 2014 Winter Olympics in Sochi begin, I would be much happier if you are not representing the United States.  The world should not have to witness more of your crashes or the lackadaisical attitude you show towards the Olympic games.  Keep enjoying those worthless world cup medals that nobody in the United States cares about...

To recap, Lindsey Vonn crashed and/or DQ'ed in three of her five events.  In any other American sport, the media would be labeling her as a choker.  But because she won a gold medal*, she gets a pass.  I don't buy it.  Choking in more than half of your Olympic events is special, but not in a good way.  She should be branded from this point forward as The Perpetual Choker.
*I don't acknowledge her "bruised shin" as an excuse for crashing/DQ'ing since she won a gold medal in her first event.  Her health was fine.  And the broken pinky finger she suffered in event #4 was not the reason she choked in event #5.

Side Note:

Update to "Very Long Wait" post:  Netflix finally sent me The Hangover!! 
Let's review -  The Hangover was released on DVD/Blu-Ray on December 15, 2009 and I received it on March 3rd, 2010.  78 days - Unacceptable!!