General Gripe #5: "Cornblah"

Things that I Love about Cracker Barrel:  

Biscuits
Side Dishes
Friday Fish Fry
Dumplings
Cottage Cheese
Fast Service
Iced Tea
Mac and Cheese
All-Day Breakfast

Things that I Hate about Cracker Barrel:

Nasty Children Fighting over Big Checker Boards
Waiting to be Seated (in their crammed "Retail Store")
"Cornbread" (the worst ever)

My dining experiences at Cracker Barrel have lead me to conclude that putting a yummy item (Biscuits) on the same plate as a nasty item (Cornbread) can ruin the whole dining experience.  As you can see from the two lists above, the positive aspects of the Cracker Barrel experience greatly outnumber the negatives. Yet I find my pleasant Cracker Barrel experiences being compromised each time by one of those negative aspects.  The fighting children and waiting in line are typical occurrences that I have learned to accept when I dine at the Cracker Barrel.  But I will not accept their horrible cornbread!!  It is always dry and flavorless - two qualities unbecoming of cornbread. 

How is it possible that their "cornbread" is so utterly bland when the biscuits are so good!! Their biscuits actually make butter obsolete, where as I need five pounds of butter before I can consume tolerate their cornbread!!  In my honest opinion, "cornbread" is not an appropriate word to describe the counterpart to the biscuit on Cracker Barrel's bread plate.  I think many people would agree that Cracker Barrel's cornbread is barely edible.

Since Cracker Barrel will continue to serve a paltry cornbread in the future, it is only right that I give it a naming more becoming of its characteristics.  From this point forward, Cracker Barrel's "cornbread" shall be called...

Cornblah