Wednesday, April 28, 2010

General Gripe #5: You Welcome

Facts:
"You Welcome" is not an English phrase.
"You're Welcome" is an English phrase. 
"You are Welcome" is an English phrase.

Why do I present these facts?  Because you would be surprised how many people will respond to a "thank you" or "thanks" with the phrase "You Welcome".  Where did this moronic phrase originate?  Is it part of the new English American language?  I must have missed the memos notifying everybody to start using American slang instead of proper English.  

Using the phrase "You Welcome" in conversation is never correct!!  It is fundamentally wrong in grammar, syntax, and punctuation.  I think the use of "You Welcome" is a result of people not wanting to speak an additional syllable/word out of pure laziness.  Are people really that lazy?  Actually, don't answer that question; the high probability of your answer being yes scares me...

Just listen closely the few next times somebody is responding to your "thank you" or "thanks".  You'll be surprised how many people use the phrase "You Welcome" instead of the proper English response "You're Welcome" or "You are Welcome".  Maybe we should start calling English classes in the United States American Slang classes?  At least then, there would be a justification for people's blatant misuse of the English language in conversation.  It still wouldn't change the fact that I really dislike the phrase "You Welcome" - it just sounds so wrong to me.

Sooner or later, I'm going to call somebody out on their bad English!!  You better hope it isn't you!!

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Sports Gripe #5: Memos for my disappointing teams...

Redskins

Players that have a 100 million dollar contract should do whatever their employer asks of them...Shut Your Hole Haynesworth, go to the off-season workouts, and stop being a lazy blob!!

Orioles

Players being 6 million dollars to pitch one inning in a baseball game should never give up more than one run...You Really Suck Gonzalez (epic fail)!! 

The team should not hesitate to teach Reimold (a Left-Fielder) a second position if there is a better Left-Fielder already on the team but a worse player at comparable position (1st Base)...Stop being so arrogant Trembley Super-IdiotReimold > Atkins

Bad teams find a way to lose winnable games...2010 O's = 2009 O's

Hitting with runners in scoring position is just as important as home runs...clutch hitting is not the O's forte

Wizards

More wins means less ping pong balls and a lesser chance at the 1st, 2nd, or 3rd pick in the NBA draft...please start playing bad again